In the spring of 2018, I was two months away from college graduation. Between the cap and gown pictures, graduation party planning, and days working an internship, it was a busy time filled with excitement.
At least it was supposed to be.
I’d had a realization earlier that semester. There was a wrinkle in my soul, a feeling of unrest. Truly, when I thought about the current career path I was walking, the peace of God was nowhere to be found.
I’d realized that the future I’d planned was simply not what I was meant to do.
Constantly, I wrestled with this unnerving feeling. When you work for four years toward a specific goal, answer everyone’s questions about your future with the same response again and again, put all your energy into one thing… It’s quite unsettling to suddenly know that it’s just not right anymore.
What would I do now? How would I tell everyone? And if I wasn’t supposed to do this, what was I supposed to do?
Those were all questions I asked myself on repeat.
But of course, God had a plan. A greater, more amazing plan than I could have ever imagined. He truly knows us better than we know ourselves.
I began seeking Him with everything I had. Praying for guidance, for wisdom to make the right decision. And slowly, but surely, He revealed to me little-by-little what I needed to do next.
God is so faithful that way.
But that’s where a lot of us get stuck. We go to God in times of need. We ask Him to do awesome things in our lives. He is faithful and reveals an answer. But then we stop right there.
We don’t do a single thing with what He’s told us, and then we wonder why nothing is changing. We wonder where God went.
This happened to me so strongly, the feeling of distance between me and God was almost too great to bear. The Lord had shown me what He wanted me to do next with my life, the beginning of a path He wanted me to take. I set my foot on it, but I didn’t truly commit to the journey.
It was almost as if I didn’t really believe that this could be what He had for me.
So I stayed stuck for months. I graduated college and went back to an old part-time job I had before, basically buying time and waiting on God to show me what to do. But the thing was, He already had. I was just too stingy, too afraid, too self-conscious to fully say yes.
I was reluctant to take a step of faith.
Living a life for the Lord isn’t a one man show. It isn’t all about what God is going to do for us. We have a part to play too. There are things we must do as well. If you feel stuck, distant from God, and like nothing is moving along…
Stop asking God what He’s going to do, and start asking God what you need to do!
He’s probably already told you. God is never silent. God is never out of reach. We are just not tuned in to what He has to say, or are unwilling to act on His plan.
Once I took the leap of faith and dived completely head first into what the Lord was calling me to do… That was when true peace and true fulfillment washed over me like a flood.
I felt unqualified. I didn’t know what I was doing. And I didn’t know what tomorrow looked like. But I knew what I needed to do today. And that was enough.
That should always be enough.
Learning to fully trust God’s commands even when it seems scary, crazy or possibly stupid, is what this relationship with Him is all about. That’s what He’s been teaching me through this last year, and I’ve grown deeper in Him than ever before!
Taking steps of faith is how God leads us into our calling. One step at a time, each day moving forward little-by-little, and then letting Him handle the rest!
Cassidy is the founder of the Strong Tower Ministries, which is a God-centered community helping women grow strong in their faith.
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